I don’t know if I’ve written about this yet, but when Will and I went through pre-marital counseling, our preacher/mentor/friend-to-family previous youth minister gave us the most important advice that anyone has ever given us about being married. Let me paraphrase, if you come into marriage expecting it to be a 50/50 relationship, you’re relationship will be a disaster. Your marriage will fail, and it will not be a marriage intended by God. A marriage is a 100/100% relationship. You’ve got to give your marriage, your spouse, 100% of yourself. Their emotions, their well-being, their dreams deserve 100% of you.
There are not many marriages that I look up to. I can probably count on one hand how many married couples I admire. I learn from them; I watch them; I adore them. Our marriage has for sure been tested and tried. But ya’ll, we’ve not forgotten that sage advice we received before we were even married. That advice has saved our marriage; it has evolved the way we communicate, the way we treat each other, the way we love on each other. Think about it. If you only gave half of yourself to something, say your job… you’re miserable, and will most likely eventually be fired. Why on earth would you give only half of yourself to the most important relationship in your life… other than your relationship with the Father, obviously… ?
Commitment; true and pure and honest commitment, is so rare these days. It hurts my heart, my soul. The world wants us to think that the grass is greener somewhere else, that it’s ok to have a side relationship from your marriage. That’s just of the devil. Plain and simple. That is NOT the marriage the Lord intended us to be a part of. That is not respectful, nor is it honorable. It is selfish and self-pleasing and disgusting.
This post is vastly different from most of the others, but for some reason, this was placed in my heart to share. There is just no honest love, no honor, no respect, no decency, no 100% commitment in the “relationships,” the “marriages,” that so many folks are a part of. Who would even want to be married to someone who didn’t love you so much more than anyone else, but instead thought that sleeping with someone else, dating someone else, loving someone else, while married to you, was even an option?! I mean… get with it ya’ll. Be men and be women. Be the example the world needs. Not the example the world wants. Be different. Be uncommon. Be the old married couple who still sneaks kisses in public; that’s 100% my goal. For Will to still want to sneak kisses and booty pats. Be the young married couple who leads other young married couples. Be the married couple who teaches your children what love really is; how men should treat women and how women should treat men. Be the example of the marriage the Lord wants us to be a part of. Stand up and stand out. Make the sacrifices. Be respectful. Be kind. Be genuine. Be vulnerable. To each other. For each other.
Till next time!